WWE HEAT
(Commentators - Todd Grisham & Jonathan Coachman)

Charlie Haas Vs Val Venis: Venis and Haas. Penis and Arse. Do I need to write any more than that? I guess I do. These two normally have decent Heat matches against each other, but, you know, it's Val Venis and Charlie Haas, what is there to say? Let's try this: Haas gets the heat, and works over the back and neck, including using a belly-to-belly suplex. Venis tries to fight back with a suplex of his own, but sells the back in failing to execute the move, although he goes on to get a two count from a small package. Val's real comeback starts as both men are down, then Haas misses a charge in the corner allowing Val to hit a clothesline and a sit out slam for two. Grisham likens this to Rocky and Apollo Creed. If he means after Apollo was killed (by Beth Phoenix I believe), he might have a point. The half-nelson slam gets Haas down long enough for Val to go up top, but Charlie raises his knees on the Money Shot attempt and looks for the pin. Venis manages to change the leverage and take the victory. I've seen much worse but expect much better from these two.
Winner: Val Venis (Time 7:24)

WWE Rewind: We are treated to some replays of Candice Michelle falling flat on her face. I'm saying nothing, I wouldn't want to upset the sensibilities of some forum members.

Snitsky Vs Derek McQuinn:
Winner: Snitsky (1:28)

Hacksaw Jim Duggan & Super Crazy Vs The Highlanders: Hacksaw and Crazy are given some mic time. Let me see if I can do this justice: Hacksaw says "Hooooo"; Crazy says "Siiiiiiii"; Hacksaw says "Hooooo"; Crazy says "Siiiiiiii"; Hacksaw says "Hoooooo"; Crazy says "Siiiiiiii"; Hacksaw says "Hooooo"; The Highlanders music hits. Is this what happens when WWE guys aren't given scripted promos? Super Crazy starts the match off with Robbie McAllister. Not much happens. Duggan and Rory have a go. Duggan tries to ram Rory's head into the turnbuckle but it has no effect: Rory tries to ram Duggan's head into the turnbuckle but he blocks it. Match of the freakin' year. Just as I'm wishing for one of those Jericho interruptions to saveme.222, I get an ad for Cyber Sunday. Right now, I'll take anything.

As we return, Duggan is fighting out of a Robbie headlock. He gets free but then gets knocked down again. The hot tag eventually comes twelve hours later as Duggan gets a shoulder up in the corner, and Crazy comes in for some high-flying goodness. Actually, after the last twelve hours and five minutes of this match Big Daddy V would look like high-flying goodness. A standing moonsault pin attempt on Rory is broken up by Robbie, who is cleared from the ring by Duggan. On the outside, Robbie manages to throw Hacksaw into the ringpost and climb onto the apron, distracting a corner-climbing Crazy. Rory pulls Crazy down and rolls him up for the tights-grab assisted three count. Horrific.
Winners: The Highlanders (12hrs8:24)

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