I tried watching 'Brooke Knows Best'. Unfortunately the show needs to be spiced up, especially before ratings start to decline. Usually the answer is to have every celebrity friend stop by and make cameo appearances. Unfortunately there has been 5 seasons of 'Hogan Knows Best'. The audience needs new cameo appearances other than Brian Knobbs, Jimmy Hart, etc. I decided to produce a episode of 'Brooke Knows Best'. Granted we all realize the Hogan reality shows are all part work. I booked this show with new celebrities. Wrestlers will always come out of the woodwork to associate themselves with the Hulkster and his family.

Brooke invites Hulk to her new spacious condo. Hulk asks if there will be any guys over? Brooke says don't worry about me. Hulk says "I'm more concerned that Linda will be looking to hook up with guys here". Hulk than questions Brooke about her house guest. That house guest would be Bryan Alvarez. Bryan kay fabes Hulk by saying he's gay. Hulk says "how do I know your gay"? Bryan replies that he enjoys spending his evenings by having long talks with his buddy Vinny about wrestling. They even wrestled each other on DVD. Hulk replies "that's not gay enough"? "I need more proof". "I have wrestling friends who are gay". Bryan replies that he went to Disney World with his pal Dave and took in a mix martial arts show in the evening. Hulk asks if that same Dave is "Dave Meltzer"? Bryan replies that he keeps those trips "strictly confidential". Hulk blows a gasket about burning a Observer on Monday Night Nitro and how he hates sheet writers. Hulk than grabs Bryan by his collar [note the alleged Jiu Jitsu fighter does nothing]. Bryan starts shaking big time. He than blurts out that he thought the Chyna sex tape was hot! Hulk says "you must be gay if that tape turned you on". Hulk walks away from Bryan in disgust.

Hulk than tells Brooke how guys can be stalking her by climbing buildings and roof tops. She needs a 24 hour doorman that can look out for her and stretch any unwanted guests. Hulk brings in Iron Sheik as Brooke's official "doorman/enforcer". Hulk says its the least he can do for the guy who put the title on him in 1984. Sheik replies "thank you Hogan, thank you". "You are number one". Hulk than exits the lobby. Sheik starts lighting up a joint and starts blurting out, "fuck you hollywood faggot". "You are a bigger faggot than Michael Jackson"!

Hulk than realizes he needs to find somebody who can follow Brooke around town. This private security needs to be incognito. Hulk enlists Quinton "Rampage" Jackson. Hulk asks what kind of discrete vehicle will he be using to follow Brooke. Quinton reveals his big hummer with pictures of Quinton Jackson all over it. Hulk starts screaming how he wanted Quinton to be discrete. Quinton defends his vehicle. Noting that the truck doesn't have spinning rims and hydraulic lifts to make it bounce. Hulk just rolls his eyes in disbelief.

Brooke decides to get alcohol and food for her secret party. Quinton starts following Brooke. Everything is going fine. Brooke is oblivious to the truck that bares Quinton's likeness. All of a sudden Rampage sideswipes a car. Brooke turns to look at the accident. Quinton panics and starts riding on the sidewalk and almost hits pedestrians. This undercover mission has already gone to hell. Brooke enters a drug store. Quinton follows her, but he covers his face with a magazine. We over hear Brooke on the phone asking "what kind of protection does a 19 year old guy prefer"? Quinton over reacts and calls Hulk. All of a sudden Quinton hears cop sirens. Quinton jumps in his truck to flee from the police and continue spying on Brooke. Quinton eventually blows out his tire as he is being pursuit by the police. Quinton realizes he needs to clue Hulk about Brooke's secret party, despite his cop chase and blown out tire. He goes to Hulk's house. Hulk is waiting for Quinton. Quinton is huffing and puffing about Brooke's purchase of alcohol and the drug store purchase. Hulk demands "what did she buy"? Right before Quinton blurts out "protection", the cops draw guns on Quinton and drag him off.

Hulk decides to break in and invade Brooke's party. Iron Sheik is smoking weed in the lobby area and threatening to "f*ck Hogan in the a** and make him humble if he ever sees him again". Hulk notices this and Sheik drops everything and starts swinging his clubs for no apparent reason. Sheik says he got everything under control.

Hulk kicks down the door and watches Linda having 19 year olds doing jello shots off her stomach. Hulk than watches Brooke entertaining 5 people in her hot tub. Sandman is flinging glasses at guests and the police. Iron Sheik is screaming on the intercom for his medicine. Randy Savage is annoying all of the guests by saying he came to the party to shoot on Hulk. Bryan Alvarez is doing a late breaking audio update from the condo about the carnage.

Brooke screams at Hulk. "You ruined everything". "This was your surprise birthday party". Hulk is embarassed. Brooke tells Hulk they got him a custom made motorcycle. Hulk demands to see it. Linda says "my boyfriend is driving it right now". Hulk opens up all his gifts. Among Hulk's gifts is a autographed copy of 'The Death Of WCW'. Bryan even came down to autograph it. After Hulk opens up all of his gifts, Linda demands half of everything. Linda says he can keep 'The Death Of WCW' book. Hulk than blurts out to Brooke about her buying protection. Brooke screams back the protection is for mom and her 19 year old boyfriend. Everybody starts laughing, accept Hulk.

Outside we cut to Quinton running away from the police. Iron Sheik is in the lobby showing all of Brooke's friends how to make a bong out of a watermelon. Sandman is being pummeled by the police for resisting arrest. Randy Savage is still waiting to shoot on Hulk. Brooke's first condo party is a hit!

Next week on 'Brooke Knows Best': Brooke takes Quinton Jackson and Nick Hogan for driving lessons.

I hope everybody enjoys my scripted episode of 'Brooke Knows Best'. I bet my episode will be better than the actual show.

Don't forget to stop by at www.missyhyatt.net. My site has tons of reality videos, backstage videos, and tons of new pictures added constantly.

Missy Hyatt
www.missyhyatt.net
F4W Best Female Boarder 2008 [my first Hemme award]
F4W Life Time Achievement Winner {plug}