Thursday, 10 October 2013 21:21
10.10 Impact Wrestling
The Big News: The bulk of the Bound for Glory card is now finalized. Kurt Angle made his long-awaited return, stopping Bobby Roode's EGO Hall of Fame induction to jump all three members of EGO. Angle will face Roode at BFG. Also, there will be a three-way Knockouts Championship match between ODB, Brooke and Gail Kim. Sting and Magnus started bickering at each other, despite beating Bad Influence. The name "Hulk Hogan" wasn't mentioned on the show, but he was alluded to several times.
Dixie Carter came out and started talking about Hulk Hogan, going out of her way to not mention Hogan's name. Carter said he would never be heard from on her television show again, and she didn't need anyone telling her how to run her wrestling company. Not any "Vince, has been Eric Bischoff, Mr. Stephanie Levesque, or those good ole' boy Jarretts." She claimed to be the best anyone had ever seen. Then she started in on A.J. Styles. Carter said that she had given Bully Ray total freedom to put Styles in any match he chose tonight. I know Aces and Eights is dying on the vine, but it doesn't help their status as an "outsider group" when the TNA owner is giving the A&8's top guy favors. Sting came out, and Carter said every wrestler in the back is under her review, and that included Sting. Carter laid into Sting for recommending Hogan as the company GM. When Sting wanted to know what was going on with her, Carter wouldn't listen. She was also upset at Sting for making his own match at Bound for Glory against Magnus. She warned that Sting could end up like Styles, without a contract. Well, it can't be that bad since Styles is still showing up at all the shows. Carter ordered Sting and Magnus to take on Christopher Daniels and Kazarian tonight. If either Sting or Magnus lose, they won't be at BFG. Plus, Carter teased they would be fired.
Austin Aries said Jeff Hardy was trying to steal his spot once again. Aries said Hardy needed ladders and high wires, but he's a wrestler. Aries said he would remain undefeated in Ultimate X matches at Bound for Glory as he left to face Hardy.
Styles did a promo backstage saying it was nice to be back in the arena without having to worry about security. He said Dixie was only worried about power and leverage, but after Bound for Glory, he would have both.
1. Austin Aries defeated Jeff Hardy in 14:19. They had a hot opening few minutes, culminating with Hardy diving off the apron for a clothesline to the floor. Following a commercial, Aries sent Hardy to the floor and followed with a double axehandle off the top rope. Then he did it again. Aries missed a missile dropkick, and Hardy made his comeback with the flying forearm. Aries dodged a Hardy charge into the corner, hit a neckbreaker and followed with a missile dropkick. Hardy blocked Aries' dropkick into the corner and turned Aries with a release power bomb. Hardy nailed the Whisper in the Wind and tried the Swanton, but Aries drop kicked the ropes to crotch Hardy. Aries then went to the top rope and spiked Hardy with a brainbuster off the top rope. Hardy looked like he landed on his neck as Aries struggled to get his footing right before the big finishing spot. Crowd, small as it was, went wild for Hardy and was surprised at the finish. They also applauded both men. ***3/4
Samoa Joe came out immediately after the finish and put over both men. Joe also announced himself as the fifth man in the X Division Ultimate X match at Bound for Glory, so clearly the company is trying to rebuild the X Division. I guess this means the weight limit for the X Division is out the window, unless Joe does one of those Joe Riggs' 65-pound weight cuts in three days leading up to BFG.
Robbie E and Jessie Godderz were backstage. Godderz bragged about bagging nine girls in five hours. Robbie asked Godderz about losing to ODB last week. Godderz said there was an asterisk next to that loss because technically, ODB wasn't a girl. Godderz shot back about Robbie losing to Joseph Park and Eric Young twice in less than five seconds. He said they weren't on the record books, and at least he didn't lose to a girl. Jessie said he was going to take care of their biggest problem right now.
Park and Young were set to drive from Tulsa to San Diego for Bound for Glory. Jeremy Borash said updates would be made available on impactwrestling.com. Young assured his mother he had his driver's license so everything would be fine. They went about 50 feet before Young stopped the van, saying he couldn't leave since ODB had a match tonight.
Back in the ring, Godderz called down ODB, who came out with Young.
2. ODB defeated Jessie Godderz by DQ in 2:07. Robbie tripped ODB, which led to him and Young brawling to the back. As ODB pulled out her flask, Lei'd Tapa came out. Tapa had a wardrobe change, with a big black robe. She destroyed ODB, finishing her off with a Yakuza kick and a TKO. Tapa held up the Knockouts title. In the past, the new monster heel would destroy five or six people before finally reaching the champion. This time, I guess it's different because there are only two babyfaces in the entire Knockouts division, and Tapa destroyed Velvet Sky last week.
Garrett Bischoff and Knux were upset at Bully Ray over Aces and Eights being down to three members. Ray blamed the departures on Mr. Anderson, saying he was the one who agreed to the stipulation that led to Devon being ousted from the company. And he was the one who agreed to face Ray for the World Title, something that Bischoff and Knux would have never agreed to. Ray said he wanted to remain a unit, and wanted Knux and Bischoff to face Styles tonight in a handicap match so they could shine and prove themselves. They all shook hands.
Sting and Magnus talked backstage about their upcoming match at Bound for Glory. Magnus said it would be the biggest match of his career. Sting said Bound for Glory had been good to him, winning the world title three times.
The camera crew knocked on the Extraordinary Gentlemen's Organization's dressing room. Kazarian poked his head out the door and said "No, you can't see the wizard. Come back tomorrow." Daniels also poked his head out and said the ceremony for Bobby Roode into the EGO Hall of Fame would be one of a kind.
Daniels and Kazarian came out for the Hall of Fame ceremony dressed in Orange and powder blue tuxedos, just like Jim Carrey and Jeff Daniels in "Dumb and Dumber." Kazarian said they dressed to honor the fans, who were dumb and dumber. Kazarian decried Jose Canseco not being in the Baseball Hall of Fame, the Rock n' Roll Hall of Fame has yet to induct Judas Priest (well, he's got a point there), and the Impact Wrestling Hall of Fame has yet to induct Bad Influence. Kazarian introduced Roode by saying "He once got busy in a Tim Horton's bathroom." Roode came out and was seated in his own throne. Kazarian presented an induction video which was hilarious, including baby photos of Roode while he still had a fully grown beard as an infant. Aries, Hardy and Styles had doctored soundbites where there voice didn't match their mouths talking about how Roode deserved to be in the hall of fame. In his induction speech, Roode thanks Daniels and Kazarian before getting choked up. Roode thanked one other individual, someone who was the only reason the fans were watching. Of course, the person who Roode was talking about was himself. Roode then cut a promo on Kurt Angle, saying he didn't deserve to be in the Hall of Fame. Roode said he had been carrying the company, and where was Angle all of this time? Roode started to say when Angle came out after months away and came to the ring. He was in great shape. Angle got in the ring and dropped Kazarian on his head doing a back suplex, and Daniels also got a suplex. Angle challenged Roode to a match at Bound for Glory.
Roode cut a fiery promo on Angle, saying he would pay for ruining his Hall of Fame induction ceremony.
3. Brooke defeated Velvet Sky to become the third person in the Knockouts three-way at Bound for Glory, joining Gail Kim and ODB. Match went 3:53. Sky was still selling the beating that Tapa gave her last week while Chris Sabin was more concerned with playing up to the crowd. Sabin also blocked the best part of Sky's "Let the Pigeons Loose" ring entrance with his jacket. Now that got him heat with me. It wasn't the worst match these two have had on Impact, but it was still bad. Finish came when Sabin tried to give Sky some instructions, allowing Brooke to sneak up from behind and get the pin with a schoolgirl cradle while holding the tights. -*
Ethan is now under the name Ethan Carter the Third. The same vignette from last week aired, except it was billed as being from "earlier today."
4. Sting and Magnus defeated Bad Influence in 10:58. Kazarian was favoring his neck from Angle's suplex during the ring entrance. Sting and Magnus came out to Sting's music, so I guess the Main Event Mafia is largely retired now. Sting and Magnus nearly collided during one spot, and then Kazarian dropkicked Magnus into Sting, who wound up on the floor.Magnus got hammered for several minutes until he floored Daniels with a clothesline to make the tag to Sting. Sting tagged Magnus to give him the Randy Savage elbow. Sting wanted Magnus to pin him there, but Magnus instead went for the King's Lynn Cloverleaf. Daniels jumped Magnus from behind to break up the submission attempt. Sting made a blind tag, gave Kazarian a Stinger Splash and pinned him after the Scorpion Death Drop. Magnus was mad he didn't get a chance to pin Kazarian, and he and Sting wound up arguing. **1/2
Styles was on his way to the ring when Dixie stopped him. Carter said Styles didn't have to wrestle tonight, and offered Styles a huge check. If he accepted the money, all Styles would have to do is retire. Styles did the Hogan-deal from 1988 with Ted DiBiase, teasing taking the money, then tore the check up. OK, let's review this one. Why would Dixie want to pay off one of her best wrestlers to never wrestle again? Especially when he usually has the best matches on the card when he performs? And isn't his contract about to run out anyway? Why not wait four months, not resign him, and save whatever you just offered him since the company is already in financial trouble? Jesus, was Vince Russo vacationing in Tulsa and decided to make a guest appearance writing this incomprehensible piece of crap segment?
5. A.J. Styles defeated Garrett Bischoff and Knux in a handicap match in 4:46. Ray did commentary with Taz, chasing Mike Tenay from the commentator's table. Styles got a big pop coming out and stayed heavily involved in the match. It was like Styles was the top face in the company. Bischoff botched a spot where he was supposed to duck a clothesline. Knux came in and did all sorts of power moves on Styles. Bischoff did a butterfly suplex, but Knux missed a second rope legdrop. Styles leaped over Bischoff for a springboard forearm onto Knux. Bischoff held Styles for Knux, who accidentally hit Bischoff. Styles caught Knux with a Pele kick and pinned Bischoff with what was supposed to be a small package, I think. But it looked nothing like it. Funny how this match had so much heat, and it was one of Styles' worst TV matches in years. *
Postmatch, Knux and Bischoff put the boots to Styles. Then Ray got in the ring, and ordered Bischoff and Knux to stay in the corner while he whipped Styles with a chain. As Bully whipped Styles, he chastised Knux and Bischoff for losing the match. Styles worked his way back to his feet, but Ray backdropped him hard on the ramp. Styles landed badly and Ray stood over him and mouthed off.
SUMMARY: The heel authority figure angle would come off as so lame even if the WWE wasn't doing it. Now, it's just leading to bad skits and nonsensical angles. The Aries-Hardy match was the best thing on the show.