"Mr. Pec-tacular" (tm) Jessie Godderz, who is not wearing his pink bunny suit yet, walks down the hallway. He passes Rockstar Spud and "Diamond Steel" Ryan Howe and they laugh at him, sounding like Beavis and Butthead. Godderz keeps walking and passes by Eddie Diamond and Timmy Danger (who is wearing a do-rag) and they laugh at him too, saying "What's up doc?". Godderz then comes up on another guy (?) who says "What's up Easter Bunny? Got my candy?"
"Team Boomstick" Jay Bradley is in the ring. He says he read in the bible that we are supposed to look out for those that cannot take care of themselves. He tried to put this into practice by throwing a birthday party two weeks ago for OUR OVW Champion Jamin Olivencia to celebrate his life and celebrate him as a competitor, but Jamin ended up embarrassing him. It was amusing to hear Bradley being heckled by the crowd during while saying this. Then last week, Jamin made a parody of his good-willed actions by having a "Jay Bradley Appreciation Night". Bradley states that Jamin has forced his hand and Bradley will have to be the superior individual in this. Bradley believes Jamin is acting this way because he is afraid, referring to him as an "emotional dwarf". He says he has beaten Jamin three times then brings up that Jamin got himself disqualified at their match at Saturday Night Special a few weeks back (nevermind that it was Bradley's foreign object).
Jamin comes out to say that Bradley is full of crap and that Bradley is no "Jamin Olivencia-OVW Heavyweight Champion". Jamin says Bradley had to load his "Boomstick" because he couldn't beat Jamin! He says if Bradley wants to use the "Boomstick", let's do it by taking the loaded "Boomsleeve" (the arm pad Bradley uses) and putting it ON A POLE!!! Jamin says he will beat Bradley's face in so bad that Bradley will regret it for the rest of his life! Jamin turns to leave the ring but Bradley jumps him from behind and the refs come out to break it up.
In the back we see Paredyse! He hands OUR OVW Senior Official Chris Sharpe an application for the Nightmare Cup but tells Sharpe that he still needs a partner. Sharpe says the last spot was taken about ten minutes ago and points over to Diamond and Danger. We now see that Danger is also wearing a bow tie along with the do-rag. Danger says he could do good as Diamond's tag partner, he even has a playoff beard! Diamond seems concerned about Danger being in the ring but goes along with it saying "now I gotta call his momma"!
Back to ringside with OUR OVW Announce Team of Dean Hill, "Anchorman" Gilbert Corsey, and "Rocky Mountain Mouth" Michael Titus. Though he is not shown, OUR OVW Ring Announcer is Shannon the Dude. Gilbert says tonight the Mobile Homers make their return!
Match #1: "King of Pink" Dylan Bostic & Yaden Matthews vs "The Teflon Don from Boca Raton" Eddie Diamond & Timmy "Rampage" Danger
Danger is wearing boots and tights in what is apparently his wrestling debut. It's also implied that this is a warm-up match since Danger & Diamond are already in the Nightmare Cup. The announcers wonder aloud about Danger's wrestling skills. Diamond and Bostic swap moves as Dean and Gilbert want to do an in-depth interview with Matthews to get some dirt on Titus? Diamond clotheslines Matthews to the apron and tags in Danger. Bostic slugs Danger as he tries some armworking then throws him into the wrong corner for some brief double teaming. Matthews slams Danger, who manages to strategically roll away in order to make Bostic miss on an elbow drop and a splash. Danger hesitates to tag out and Matthews clobbers him from behind while Bostic knocks Diamond off the apron. Bostic and Matthews stomp away on Danger as OUR OVW Official Josh Ashcraft starts counting then calls for the bell. After a short pause, it is announced that Bostic and Matthews were disqualified thus Danger & Diamond are the winners!
They plug the Elizabethtown, KY event on 8/31 with Bill Dundee coming in plus the main event of Bradley vs Trailer Park Trash with Danny Davis as ref for control of OVW-Elizabethtown!
"Best Rudy Ever" Rudy Switchblade comes down the hall and spots a handwritten sign that says "Do not unplug-signed Mr. Pectacular" and follows the cord around to the restroom where Godderz is dressed in the bunny suit and is holding a metal stage light fixture against his body. Rudy says that ever since he and Godderz broke up, he's been winning and hanging out with rockstars. Godderz, who is clearly distressed, says he remembers when he was winning but now he has to do this since he is at an all time low because he lost to Dean Hill! Rudy pats Godderz on the shoulder as he walks out of the restroom. We see Godderz turn the shower on and say "no more Easter" as Rudy is standing around the corner listening to this. Rudy goes back and offers to help Godderz out, even offering to tag with him if that's what it takes to get him out of his despair. Godderz is enthused about this and leaves the restroom to set this up. Gilbert says the desperation of Godderz and the compassion of Switchblade lead to the reunion of the Best Team Ever.
Match #2: "Welsh Colossus" Rob Terry vs OUR OVW TV Champion Flash Flanagan (w/fellow Marauders Shiloh Jonze, Raul Lamotta, & Joe Coleman)
Flash still has the blue kendo stick and jumps Terry from behind. Terry slams Flash as Lamotta climbs up on the apron but ref Sharpe chases him away. Terry catches Flash off the ropes and slams him again for 2 then squashes him in the corner. Flash rakes the face and climbs up top but Terry grabs him and throws him off then hits Jonze, Lamotta, and Coleman as they each climb up on the apron as we go to break.
Back from break, Flash comes off the top with a dropkick and peppers Terry with fists. Flash drapes Terry across the bottom rope so the other Marauders can choke him. Flash then chops Terry before dumping him out to the floor for more marauding. Back in, Terry gets hooked into a sleeper but gets to his feet and fights out, then catches Flash off the ropes with a kneelift and goes all offensive on him. Coleman runs in and gets power slammed then Lamotta comes in and gets power bombed. Jonze slides the kendo stick to Flash, who whacks Terry with it and rolls him up with the Handful O'Tights for the pin.
Jonze takes the mic and tells us that seeds of oppression plant seeds of revolution. He says the OVW Board of Directors won't pull strings on the Marauders, implying that he and Coleman are entering the Nightmare Cup as a separate team (as opposed to Flash and Lamotta, who lost their Cup match last week). Jonze demands that their Nightmare Cup opponents come out right now! They do as we go to break.
Match #3: Joe Coleman & Shiloh Jonze (w/Flash & Lamotta) vs The Mobile Homers (Adam Revolver & "Man-Beast" Ted McNaler w/Brittany Devore!!)
This was joined in progress coming back from the break. Homers work over Jonze to start as Gilbert tells us that the BOD did rule that the Marauders could have 2 teams in the Nightmare Cup, in which the Homers went to the finals last year (losing to Michael (not PS) Hayes & James "Moose" Thomas). It was also noted that both Homers are coming off injuries and there was some concern as to whether McNaler would come back at all. Anyway, Jonze gets free and tags Coleman, who also gets isolated and worked over. Homers double hiptoss Jonze and double elbow Coleman, which leads to a regrouping on the outside by the Marauders. Back in, the Homers give each opponent a butterfly suplex and it's right back out for more regrouping. Homers this time dive out onto the Marauders as Gilbert opines that the Homers are back with a vengeance! Homers isolate Jones in the ring but Flash sneaks in with a chair. OUR OVW Tag Team Champions Mohamed Ali Vaez and Michael (not PS) Hayes come out!! Hayes pulls Flash out of the ring and the champs deal with him and Lamotta as they brawl to the back. McNaler picks up the chair but ref Ashcraft takes it away and Jones rolls up McNaler but McNaler rolls through for 2. Homers set up their finisher as Revolver holds Jonze but Coleman pulls the top rope down and McNaler tumbles out. Jonze rolls up Revolver as Coleman holds Jonze's feet on the middle rope for the pin.
In the back, Lovely Lylah is sitting in a chair looking sad:( One of the Blossom Twins comes up to talk, Lylah is concerned about the "Miss OVW” contest, since she feels insecure because the other girls talk about her and stuff. The Blossom Twin reassures her and reminds her that she is a strong independent woman and she can get through this. They high five each other.
Titus is in the ring for round 1 of the Miss OVW contest. Titus says the ladies will be test on beauty brawn, and brains and the winner gets a tiara (hope it's not Lylah's missing one). Tonight the ladies will each be asked a question. First up is Jessie Belle, who is asked "What famous person does your personality most parallel?" Jessie's answer is Daisy Duke (notable that Jessie is dressed like her) since Daisy is a strong Southern woman and cute to boot! Next is "Twiggy" who Titus calls “Rachel”. She is asked "Which celebrity would you invite to a dinner party and why?", and replies with a fitness model named Jamie since that person is an inspiration to her. Lylah is asked "What quality do you like most about yourself and why?” Lylah stammers and finally just blurts out that she's really strong. Nikki St. John is asked "What is your definition of success?" to which she replies it's herself since all the women want to be like her and all the men want to be with her! The Blossoms are called up together and asked if they could change the world, what would it be? Each girl starts to answer but the other cuts her off. They begin to argue among themselves but Taeler Hendrix butts in and declares herself as Miss OVW! She snatches the tiara and puts it on then complains because it doesn't fit right. Taeler also states she wants the title belt back as OUR OVW Ladies Champion Trina Thompson and Lei'd Tapa are glaring at each other. Taeler grabs Trina and gets up in her face. Trina says something back and turns around as Tapa is sneaking up on her. Trina flattens Tapa with a forearm and again leaves her laying in the ring. The end of this segment had some choppy editing for some reason.
The Body Guy is in the back with a thigh master in his hand. He addresses a group of wrestlers which includes the Baxters, Elvis Pridemore, and Mr. Marvelous Melvin Maximus. Body Guy tells them that he has been given some extra special time tonight in order to show off his beautiful body for the ladies in the audience, so he would like the group to watch all the entrances and make sure the Assassin doesn't come out to attack him. Some music plays and the room goes dark. When the lights come back up, the entire group is laid out on the floor as the Assassin stands behind Body Guy. Poor Body Guy turns around and gets clobbered again. I laughed out loud at this!
The next OVW Old School show is 9/1. Gilbert talks about the Randy Royal-Tony Gunn situation as a video package set to classical music is shown. Gilbert says that Royal will remain suspended until Gunn returns to action.
Match #4: VIP Club (Joe Rosa, J Best, & "Mexicutioner" Roberto DeLuna) vs ""Best Rudy Ever" Rudy Switchblade & "Mr. Pec-tacular" (tm) Jessie Godderz
Dean is happy for Godderz and hopes he can find some contentment. Rosa and DeLuna represent the VIPs in the ring. Rudy winds up on DeLuna's arm and tries to tag out but Godderz is talking to the crowd. Godderz finally tags in but eats a lariat from DeLuna and gets dragged off to the VIP corner as they work him over perhaps to make hasenpfeffer out of him! Godderz reaches for a tag but Rosa kneelifts him and its back to the VIP corner. Godderz fights away but Best reaches through the ropes and trips him up. Ref Sharpe spots this and ejects Best from ringside! Rosa runs over and knocks Rudy off the apron, so Rudy climbs back in and drags Godderz to their corner and tags himself in. Rudy fires up on the VIPs and frog splashes one for 2 as he is slow to cover. Godderz is back in but Best sneaks back out and joins DeLuna in double suplexing Godderz for 2 and 15/16 (or 2.9375 for those of you who prefer to use decimals) before Rudy breaks the cover. Rudy and Godderz isolate Rosa and hit a death drop on him followed by Godderz covering him for the pin. Godderz is happy and begins to pull off the bunny suit as the show goes off.
THOUGHTS: So it looks like 4 teams are left in the Nightmare Cup (Hayes/Vaez, Baxters, Jonze/Coleman, & Diamond/Danger) unless the secret brackets are revealed next week. The Miss OVW segment started out fine anyway, why wasn't Brittany Devore in this? Will we see Blossom vs Blossom soon? Also where were Epiphany, Envy, and Heidi Lovelace? If the Marauders are causing chaos already, why would Gilbert keep asking when they are going to add more people? It kind of makes sense to me to have Sharpe being Danny Davis' right-hand man beings he is senior official. I realized that Danger's only offensive move was grabbing an arm! Wonder if we will see Godderz start emotionally manipulating Switchblade so he can keep tagging with Rudy (and winning)? There was a better balance of wrestling and skits this weeks so I'll give it like an upper thumbs in the middle.