WWE Raw TV report
Monday, 05 November 2012 21:39
WWE Monday Night Raw
November 5, 2012
Tonight is the night...
- Brad Maddox tells us what's up.
- Raw is taped from the UK or England or whatever, same thing.
This taped show begins with THE MIZ and PAUL HEYMAN talking backstage...
Backstage, Miz calls CM Punk a coward, and quits Team Punk. Heyman was shocked, and disappointed. The camera then panned to a poster on the wall, featuring The Miz. He shook his head. Raw also seems to have a new voice over guy preparing us for what's about the happen on the show. Maybe a one week thing? Or something new. It's like a "Last week, on Lost..." kind of vibe.
Spoilers for matches are already on the website, so this won't be too detailed in the way of match results. Also, program note, next week will be a LIVE REVIEW from Columbus, Ohio. Should be fun.
Commentary: Jim Ross & Michael Cole
Match: Antonio Cesaro, D-Young, Titus OOOOOOO'Neil vs Rey Mysterio, R-Truth, Sin Cara
Team Reysin Mysteritruth won when Truth pinned Cesaro after Mysterio and Truth hit their finishes on the US Champion. Truth and Cesaro are apparently at odds, as each had a Tout negative on the other. This crowd loved themselves some Truth, Sin, and Rey. Sin? Ross and Cole practiced saying the name of the city throughout. Less interesting than it sounds. Crowd dug it. I give it two swims.
Vickie will be out later to give security cam footage of AJ & Cena to the public.
Oh, later is now. Vickie is out saying that hanky panky is not allowed in WWE. AJ and John Cena have a problem with HONESTY, you see. Cena interrupted Vickie as she was going through her evidence. I don't know, I found this hilarious, but Cena referenced his "Five Moves of Doom" during his rant on Vickie. In part, he said, "Vickie running a clean show is like me learning a new wrestling move, it's just not going to happen!" Cena referenced the Vickie/Edge relationship, and told Vickie to stop looking for scandals. She responded by playing her new evidence. AJ was walking in bathrobe, in a hotel hallway, entering a room. Cena said that proves nothing. BUT ALAS! Vickie has MORE! Of the same room, from a different angle, John was shown in a towel hanging a DO NOT DISTURB sign on the hotel room door. Vickie told a joke afterward. Vickie wanted AJ to come out, and this crowd went wild. This crowd ruled. It's like Jerry Springer, except better acting. Yes, better. Amazing.
Every show should be done in England. Or Japan. Or AJ's backyard.
AJ was shown on the Tron, not coming to the ring. She said if she came out, she'd beat up Vickie, and she'd get fired and couldn't do what she loves to do. AJ's too smart for this, you know. Ziggs appeared, and put his arm around AJ and he said, "AJ, we all know what you love to do." She loves to do John Cena, I believe, is the point. /end
Backstage, Paul Heyman is recruiting a new member for Chick Magnet's Survivor Series team. He wants WADE BARRETT. You'd think this was Wade's home island or something with this crowd reaction. Wade said okay, but Paul owes him.
Match: Daniel Bryan w/ Kane vs Cody Rhodes w/ Damien Sandow
Rhodes pinned Bryan after CrossRhodes. This country had been waiting 10 months to get to chant YES!, and they took full advantage. Rhodes gets the jobber entrance, as had Sin Cara and R-Truth in the opening match. Rhodes hit the disaster kick outside of the ring, quickly put Bryan back in, and hit CrossRhodes for the win. Crowd was just getting started in their Bryan love again when the match ended. Abrupt.
After the match, Rhodes said Sandow could beat Kane just as easily as he beat Bryan. Kane took offense, and dragged Sandow into the ring.
Match: Kane vs Damien Sandow
Cody was wrong, as Kane won with a chokeslam. Referee Chadwick Patton kicked Rhodes and Bryan out from ringside for this one. The crowd disliked this, as did Rhodes and Bryan. Pretty basic.
BRAD MADDOX ANSWERS! This segment brought to you by the upcoming Disney sequel, "Girl Meets World", coming 2013.
Michael Cole introduced Brad Maddox, and he walked sheepishly to the ring dressed in slacks, plaid shirt, and a vest. His best Miz impression. Cole got right down to it, asking Brad if he's working with Punk and Heyman. Maddox said 'no' and that it was all him. Brad said all he wanted to be was a WWE Superstar. Holy shit does this guy have a weak voice, but man... he's man pretty. He talked about how he's not good enough to be in WWE, yet, he's in WWE. At this point, I think the crowd was chanting "You Can't Wrestle" at Mr. Maddox, but it was all British-y so who knows. So, because Brad wasn't good enough to wrestle, he was made a referee. He used this chance to make an impact. He now wants a contract, and even a match with Ryback! He's asking for a match with Ryback?! What a crazy guy!
Vince McMahon walked out. Vince said Brad will wrestle Ryback, and if Brad can win, he'll get a $1 million contract! Vince dismissed Brad, and brought out Vickie Guerrero. Vince questioned Vickie's judgment on rewarding Punk with a PPV off from defending his title due to the circumstances of his win at Hell in a Cell. Vince made Punk vs Ryback vs John Cena as the new main event of Survivor Series for the non-spinning spinner belt. He basically pushed Vickie into making it.
Match: The Miz vs Sheamus
Sheamus victory after Brogue. Big Show joined at commentary. He was quite good, too, at least I thought. Although, honestly, I didn't listen that much, because the ACTION in the ring was just too amazing. Lies. Sheamus hit White Noise then the Brogue Kick for the victory in what ended up being a pretty good, and long, match.
Show hoisted the belt up at ringside, as Sheamus looked on, and Cole and Ross put over their title rematch at Survivor Series.
Backstage, Dolph Ziggy and Vickie Guerrero were outside Vince's office talking about their Survivor Series team. So it looks like the Survivor Series match is still on, just without Punk and Ryback. She made Punk & Ziggler vs Ryback & Cena for the main tonight. Punk repeatedly asked what was wrong with Vickie. He was upset.
Backstage, Sheamus thanked William Regal for helping him in his career. Regal invited Sheamus to have a pint.
Match: Eve & Aksana vs Layla & Kaitlyn
Kaitlyn pinned Eve. Do we know who attacked Kaitlyn, yet? Kaitlyn is The Ryback of the women's division, without the hard push. Also, Aksana & Maryse would have been the best women's tag team in the history of this Earth.
Backstage, Alberto & Ricardo argued about Ziggler being the team captain at Survivor Series. Rosa ran into Del Rio, literally, and the two shared an interesting moment. Welp, goodbye Primo & Epico.
Dolph Ziggler, Wade Barrett, Damien Sandow, Cody Rhodes, and Alberto Del Rio is now the heel Survivor Series team. Team Foley is Randy Orton, Kofi Kingston, Daniel Bryan, Kane, and TO BE ANNOUNCED! Jack Swagger? Mick Foley himself? TRIPLE H??
Oh, and the whole point of Foley creating a team was because of his issue with Punk. Since Punk is out, why is Foley even bothering? How does Foley gain in this? What is his motivation now?
Match: Kofi Kingston vs Alberto Del Rio
Kofi defeats Del Rio via pinfall with help from Randy Orton's msuic. I was thrown off by John Cone's hair during this match. Kofi reversed the armbreaker into the SOS for a nearfall, but Randy Orton's music hit to distract Del Rio. Kingston then rolled up Del Rio for the win.
Randy Orton then ran into the ring in RKO'd Del Rio. Orton stared at Del Rio's prone body for a few moments while Cole and Ross promoted their Falls Count Anywhere match on Smackdown tomorrow.
By the way, vote tomorrow. If you're in the US.
Match: Epico & Primo vs Zack Ryder & Santino of Team CoBRO.
Santino pinned Epico with help from the cobra. Rosa was awfully bouncy tonight, while Zack and Santino continued to be epic dorks to the delight of the crowd.
Match: Brodus Clay vs Wade Barrett.
Wade won via pinfall after souvenir elbow. The crowd seemed to be mildly into Brodus, until Wade came out. Then they wished him immediate death. Wade, by the way, cut his epic "Winds of change" promo on NXT in England. Here, take two, more great win from Wade. He really could be the next big thing.
Again, Jerry Lawler returns next week.
Match: Jey Uso vs Heath Slater of THE 3MB
Slater wins! Usos are still here? 3MB the crowd favorites here. A couple of minutes is all it took for Slater to gain the victory over Jey with his Smash Hit (lifting DDT).
Match: CM Punk & Dolph Ziggler vs The Ryback & The John Cena
Ryback pinned Punk in this tag thriller. Punk started with some words about his victory against The Ryback at Hell in a Cell, and claimed that Vince is screwing his most talented performer again at Survivor Series by putting Punk in this triple threat match. Ryback needs more pyro and smoke breathing during his entrance. Anyway, this was a fun tag match for what it was. Ryback got the hot tag, and hit his meathook clothesline and Shellshock on Punk for the win. After the match, Ryback and Cena stared off. They're opponents in two weeks, so the whole dynamic has changed! This really is the selling point of the show... Ryback vs Cena with that other guy, who happens to be the champ.
Final Thoughts: A newsworthy show, even if mind boggling in some aspects. Overseas shows always wind up like this, it seems. Anyway, there is still one more week to go before Survivor Series, and that show will also be newsworthy. Who will complete Team Foley? How will Jerry Lawler do on his first show back? Will The Ryback eat John Cena?
Next week, on Lost.