WWE Slammy Awards 2013
December 9, 2013
Hosts: Booker T & Jerry Lawler
FANDANGO vs Daniel Bryan
The show began with an opening akin to most awards shows, with introductions of those who will be present tonight. Crowd was hot early, that's a great sign. Cole brought up how HBK is presenting the Superstar of the Year award later, which Bryan is nominated for. They teased Bryan winning and confronting Shawn, who screwed him out of the WWE title at Hell In A Cell. Funny spot in the match, as Daniel Bryan went for a headkick, Fandango kind of ducked his head a bit and Bryan missed. Cole called it like he missed... Except, both guys sold it like the kick landed just fine. Oh well. Bryan won the match with the Baisuke knee. Quite the hot start for the show.
As Bryan was celebrating the win, the lights went out and Bray Wyatt appeared on the Tron. Bray said he will prove Bryan is a monster, even if it kills him.
Booker and Lawler came out to kick off the awards portion of our show.
LOL Moment of the Year
The New Age Outlaws introduced the nominees for the funniest moment of the year. Billy Gunn had quite the all orange suit on.
Vickie Guerrero fired, and her subsequent tantrum.
Titus O'Neil throwing up. Jesus, two weeks in a row we've had to see this replay.
Snake charming the Cobra.
Winner: The Rock sings to Vickie Guerrero
Vickie came out to accept the award, which was quick, and we immediately had our next match.
Damien Sandow vs Santino
Damien Sandow beat Santino Marella with You're Welcome. Big E worked commentary again, really trying hard to promote the Intercontinental Championship. After the match, Big E went into the ring and punked out Sandow.
Doublecross of the Year
The Hounds of Justice came out, through the curtain, in suits. I immediately stopped watching. Not really, but odd they did that. Shield talked about already winning two awards, apparently on the WWE App. Subtle friction between Dean and Roman during the nominee introductions.
Mark Henry's Fake Retirement
Winner: HBK Superkicks Daniel Bryan
Paul Heyman Turns on CM Punk
Triple H Pedigrees Daniel Bryan
Shawn came out to accept the award, shaking all the members of the Shield's hands in the process.
The Miz vs Kofi Kingston
Miz beat Kofi via pinfall with a handful of tights. He and Kofi both waited in the ring during HBK's acceptance speech for their match to begin. Okay match, with Kofi really showing additional aggression, which appears to be his thing these days. Kofi heelishly hit Trouble in Paradise on Miz after the bout while Miz had his back turned.
Diva of the Year
Eve Torres retresent the award to the Bellas. Crowd booed this one. The Bellas proceeded to annoy everyone in the crowd with their victory speech.
Winners: The Bella Twins
Eva Marie (Really, she was a nominee. I swear.)
8-Man Tag Team Match
Ryback, Curtis Axel, Jack Swagger, and Antonio Cesaro lost to Rey Mysterio, Cody Rhodes, Goldust, and Big Show. Mysterio pinned Axel after the 619 and Drop The
Dime. Exciting at the end, but not the usual crazy multi-man match as we've had in the recent past.
Superstar of the Year
Lawler and Booker introduced Shawn Michaels, who is out to already present the Superstar of the Year. Thought this would have been one of judge main event awards. Shawn tried to be full babyface tonight, but the crowd was not into him that much. Obviously, the Washington crowd was still not pleased that he superkicked Daniel Bryan. Bryan, indeed, won the award. HBK reluctantly handed over the award, because all of the sudden, HBK hates Bryan? Bryan blamed HBK for not being WWE Champion right now. Bryan said "Go Seahawks" to finish up his acceptance. No real storyline progression for any type of HBK-Bryan confrontation, let alone a match. Michael Cole and JBL really promoted Bryan's win as a huge upset and surprise.
Winner: Daniel Bryan
A promo for Total Divas aired. Natalya gets in trouble for drunk dialing Stephanie McMahon. This, I have to see.
WWE honored Nelson Mandela during the commercial break before the award winner announcement.
Sin Hunico vs Alberto Del Rio
Sin Cara won again, pinning Del Rio after a sunset powerbomb and Swanton bomb. Ha, Del Rio was relegated back to doing inset promos during his entrance. Crowd didn't care much for this match early, choosing instead to cheer on the Seahawks and their QB, Russell Wilson. Later on, however, people started to care more. I think. Either that, or they were trolling both guys with sarcastic cheers. Either could be true.
Fan Participation Award
Why isn't this the "WWE Universe Participation Award?" Primetime Players presented the award to Daniel Bryan, his third win of the night (counting the WWE App awards.)
Winner: Daniel Bryan's "YES!" Chants
Let's Go Cena/Cena Sucks
Truth's "What's Up!"
Brodus Clay vs Xavier Woods
Brodus beat Woods in squash fashion. Afterwards, Clay kept going after Woods. He was held back by Tensai, and Truth came out to protect Woods.
Insult of the Year
Miz presented the award, to a chorus of boos, to Stephanie McMahon. Steph didn't consider her actions an insult, but rather a compliment. Somehow. That was it.
AJ Lee insults the Total Divas
Zeb Colter insults Americans and Foreigners
Paul Heyman calls CM Punk a loser
Winner: Stephanie McMahon tells Big Show he's worthless
CM Punk vs Dean Ambrose
Before these two could wrestle, they again had to wait in the ring after their entrances while Miz presented the award to Stephanie. The Shield came down to the ring through the crowd, but why? We've now established that they walk freely through the back without problems. Don't care. The crowd entrance is still cool.
CM Punk won with the GTS in a long, really good, match that was made more important by the not so subtle tease of the impending Shield split. Late in the match, Dean Ambrose sent Punk down the floor and grabbed the referee. Roman Reigns and Seth Rollins surrounded Punk, but did nothing. After a while, Ambrose went outside of huge ring and yelled at both guys, seemingly upset that they didn't touch Punk. Because of this, he sent both Reigns and Rollins away and told them he could beat Punk by himself. Well, he couldn't. After the match, Reigns ran back in and speared Punk.
A video aired showing great moments in WWE and World Title history.
Extreme Moment of the Year
Mick Foley presented the award to CM Punk. Punk used his speech to promote his match with the Shield on Sunday.
The Shield powerbombs The Undertaker
The Ryback slams Cena through the stage lights panel
Winner: CM Punk canes Paul Heyman
The Wyatt Family kidnaps Kane
Usos vs Wyatts
Luke Harper got the pinfall victory in this tag match after his whirlwind clothesline. Not a lot to this. The lights went out when the Wyatts were done, but they came back on and we had our next Slammy presentation. The last award of the night.
Match of the Year
Bret Hart presented the award John Cena. Al Snow must have voted a million times.
CM Punk vs Undertaker
Cody & Goldust vs The Shield
Triple H vs Brock Lesnar
Winner LOL: The Rock vs John Cena
Natalya vs Tamina
Natalya submitted Tamina to the sharpshooter. AJ ended up taking a boot from Natalya on the apron when Tamina lifted Natalya up nearby for a slam. Otherwise, a nothing filler.
Championship Ascension Ceremony
This was "the last time the WWE and World titles would be in the same ring at the same time on Raw." So, either we're getting one unified championship belt, or this is one of the better troll jobs WWE has ever done. Twenty former champions were in the ring, alongside Triple H and Stephanie, to celebrate the merging of the world titles. Big Show was in the ring, right next to Kane, because nothing ever matters. Mark Henry was in the ring with his pink jacket, ala his fake retirement speech. The crowd tried to hijack the segment by chanting for Daniel Bryan, loudly. They really should have kept him out of the ring here. Hunter had to stop his speech the chants were so loud. HBK tried to quiet the crowd down, which backfired. Bryan was laughing like it was the funniest thing ever. Hunter just stood quiet for over a minute waiting for the crowd to die down. Smartest thing he could have done, because eventually they did settle down.
HHH brought out Randy Orton, followed by John Cena. He asked for their belts right away, and the two obliged. Orton tspoke about how he has taken down Hall of Famers like Mick Foley and HBK. Orton said he would have beaten Bret Hart so bad that they wouldn't have needed a screwjob like Montreal. The crowd again tried to hijack the segment with Bryan chants.
John Cena spoke next, and started by bringing Daniel Bryan to the front. The crowd went crazy. Cena, as if talking to a fourth grader, asked Bryan to say his name and where he's from. Cena made the point that Daniel Bryan doesn't have a family pedigree, and had to work for everything he has. Unlike Orton, who was spoofed everything he has. He said Orton still hides behind Triple H, and although he is untouchable, he can't hide on Sunday. Then, in a weird bit of promoting, Cena talked about being a fighting champion and all the guys he has given shots to. He highlighted Punk and Bryan, both of which beat Cena. He said that the only true shot Bryan has ever gotten was against him, and Bryan won. Whole lot of talk about a guy who isn't in the title match, even if he should be. So Cena is the fighting champion who earns everything, while Orton is the undeserving champion who still hasn't proven his potential. Wait, fuck that. The best stuff started now...
So, Cena offered a handshake to Orton. Orton tried to attack Cena, and the two brawled briefly before all the former champions broke them up. Punk, holding back Orton, was slapped. Punk responded by punching Orton. Triple H grabbed Punk and threw him down. Punk didn't like this, and punched Triple H to a roar from the Seattle crowd. HBK, as Hunter's best friend, superkicked Punk. Bryan, seeing his chance for his own revenge, gave the running knee to HBK. This was all crazy, and so awesome, even if it just totally made everyone forget about the TLC main event.
BUT wait a minute, we're not done. Orton, still in the ring, went for Bryan but somehow knocked Stephanie McMahon down. Not going to lie, with all this happening, I didn't quite see how. Normally, I would rewind the DVR, but I am in a hotel in Cupertino and unable to do so. Anyway, Stephanie was down, which is her own fault for still being in the ring after all he'll was breaking loose. Hunter, pissed, pedigree'd Randy. Cena, Hunter, and Kane all helped Stephanie up, while Orton crawled to a corner and looked on like he had finally lost Hunter and Stephanie's backing. And boy, did he look like he knew he was in trouble now.
This final segment is a must see. Who cares if it didn't make sense, or completely made TLC useless as everyone will now be waiting to see what happens with Punk, HHH, HBK, and Bryan (which all still may be nothing.) This was a fun final segment as a self contained deal. If they end up doing HBK vs Bryan though, it will be quite huge. Ahhhh.... This show kind of sucked until that final segment. That Seattle crowd just didn't like anyone except for Bryan, which made the final segment better.
Anyway. Goodnight. Stay tuned next week to see who the Unified WWE World heavyweight Champion will be! If there is one...