FCW Television Report 18th December 2011 (finally)
Show opened up with a recap of last weeks rather eventful showdown between Husky Harris and Richie Steamboat, and Drew McIntyre’s old music played in the back ground. I liked that song.
The FCW locker room surrounded the ring as the FCW GM Maxine; who seems to look more like Melina by the week, came out and announced that Steamboat and Harris had been suspended for thirty days. It was hard to take any of this seriously with Nick Rogers and Big E. Langston in the background wearing TEAM JACKED shirts.
Chris Russo has a fabulous bowtie on this week, and Saxton’s arm sling has the words “I’m Saxxy” on it. Awesome
OH MY GOD IT’S ROB NAYLOR. Bless him he looks terrified.
Match One: Percy Watson, Titus O’ Neil & CJ Parker Vs Rick Victor, Derrick Bateman & Cory Graves
Parker has ditched the headache inducing tights along with the FCW Tag Team Championship from last week. Rick Victor has ditched the beard as well and I now know why I had no friggin’ idea who that was in the opening segment. Bateman missed the fakest clothesline I’ve seen in sometime. They had the heat on Watson for a while. Bateman is trying out for potential groomsmen for his wedding I DEMAND SKITS. Bateman out of the six in this match looks the most comfortable in the ring and probably deserves a chance as a Smackdown midcarder by now. Victor on the other hand is still rubbish and the lack of facial hair only enhances the mess on top of his head. Watson made a comeback with a huge belly-to-belly before getting the tag to Titus who cleaned house. He launched Graves in the air with a big spinebuster before throwing Parker on top with a giant splash.
Winners: Percy Watson, Titus O’ Neil & CJ Parker
Abraham Washington was ringside with some random blonde who I already hate because she’s not Maryse. I think Washington turned heel here.
Match Two: Xavier Woods Vs Colin Cassady
Woods seems to be doing a gimmick similar to that of The Pope; he’s also not very good at it. For the first time ever there actually seems to be a bit of potential with Cassady. He isn’t very good, but he can actually move around the ring without looking totally lost. Now he just needs some MOVEZ~! Woods won with a sitdown complete shot sort of thing.
Winner: Xavier Woods
Dean Ambrose called out William Regal and it was glorious as always.
I don’t want to make fun of Rob Naylor. So I won’t… for now.
Match Three: Queen of FCW Championship Aksana© Vs Raquel Diaz
Can someone please explain to me what the hell the Queen of FCW Championship is? It’s not at the top of my agendas to find out, but it really doesn’t make a lot of sense. I was going to say this match was awful but then Diaz threw out the three amigos and the Gory Bomb which I wasn’t expecting and won.
Winner and NEW Queen of FCW Raquel Diaz
Match Four for the FCW Heavyweight Championship: Leo Kruger© Vs Seth Rollins
I would just like to point out before hand. ROLLINS PLEASE STAY OFF TWITTER AND YOUTUBE YOU IDIOT. With that out of the way fingers crossed this should be good. Kruger has gone fall whack and has got himself some snazzy leopard print trunks now. Ok I’m sorry Naylor looks about twelve next to these two. Even the referee looks like he could have him. Rollins started off with some chops and Irish whips into the turnbuckle. But Kruger soon took control and applied a sleeper and worked over Rollins for a while. Rollins was going for some sort of suicide tope but Kruger smacked him square in the jaw through the ropes and it was awesome. Kruger had a Dragon Sleeper applied for a few moments to show it ain’t just Edwards that got a new trainer. Have I mentioned that Saxton is so much better as a heel commentator than Cole? I probably have. Did I also mention that they need to get out of the impact zone and probably just Florida in general? I digress. Rollins hit a huge superplex for a two count. Kruger decided he’d had enough and tried to leave exit stage right, but Rollins chased after him and brought him back to ringside. Kruger like so many others has still yet to learn the Kidman rule of Seth Rollins. Don’t go for a ten punch in the corner, because you will get ‘buckle bombed. Antonio Cesaro decided to make his presence known and with the distraction Kruger tried to hit Rollins with the belt but he ducked. Went for a roll up but ended up eating a European uppercut from Cesaro through the ropes. With that Kruger applied his Sleeper hold and eventually Rollins passed out.
Winner and still FCW Heavyweight Champion: Leo Kruger
Closing thoughts: Not a bad show overall. Main event was acceptable and another week of no Ascension!