WWE Raw Report: Singing, dancing & the exchange of gold



WWE Monday Night Raw

April 8, 2013
East Rutherford, NJ

Robert McCarron

Tonight is the night for the now annual Raw after WrestleMania featuring BIZARRO WORLD crowds. We got the most bizarre crowd since last year's Raw after Mania, but they were treated to a fun show featuring a World title change, an Undertaker appearance, a main event heel turn, and a WAVE!

John Cena Shockingly Jokes Around
The new WWE Champion, John Cena, opened up tonight's post-WrestleMania Raw with his new shirt color (white). The crowd was negative towards him, although he was trying to get them to cheer the fact that they were at Raw. They instead responded by chanting 'boring.' He put over how anything can happen on the Raw after Mania, referencing Brock's return last year. He then danced. Yep, really. He asked if the crowd wanted a little jump. A little kick. Or a little heel turn. Get it? JBL laughed. Oh yeah, JBL was on commentary tonight with Cole and King. After seven minutes, Cena quit the joking and finally did his "The champ is here" slogan. This crowd hated this guy. Cena announced he wanted to defend his WWE title tonight on Raw. Mark Henry answered the call. The crowd loudly chanted for "Sexual Chocolate." Cena joked about it. He accepted Henry's challenge for the title, but Booker T came out angry. Booker said Rock was entitled to a rematch, but Cena scoffed at that. Booker announced that Rock was #1 contender. The crowd booed that, too. Booker said Henry vs Cena will happen, but it won't be for the title. Henry has to win tonight for a title match.

Tag Team Champ Daniel Bryan vs Big E
Big E Langston beat Daniel Bryan in short order with his finish after some hijinx on the outside involving Dolph Ziggler and Kane.

Josh Mathews asked former NFL QB Kurt Warner about his new reality show. A plain looking guy held up a plain looking sign for the "plain looking" Paige in the background.

Intercontinental Championship Rematch
Wade won the title back from Miz, and this crowd LOVED it. This Raw featured a similar crowd to the one in Miami last year for the Raw following WrestleMania. They were anti-Miz, pro-Barrett, and very vulgar with their language. Miz and Wade botched Miz's inverted DDT/neckbreaker spot and the crowd let them know it. Miz tried his best to play tough guy, but no one liked him. All three guys on commentary repeatedly talked about how this crowd would be strange all night. This was a good result to keep this crowd rowdy. A fun, long match this was. Successful first hour so far.

Backstage, Vickie and Brad Maddox were talking. Sheamus came in. Sheamus wanted the Big Show in a match. Vickie gave him one. Simple enough.
After a commercial...
Backstage, Randy Orton wanted Big Show in a match. He asked Booker T for one. Booker had to break the news to him that Sheamus was already given the match. Orton guilted Booker into overruling Vickie, and it worked. HOW DOES THE SMACKDOWN GM OVERRULE THE RAW GM ON RAW? Oh well.

Zeb Colter asked for the fans' support in the following match. He wanted the crowd to chant "USA" when Del Rio came out. It didn't work, at least not during the entrance.

"We Want Ziggler"
Alberto Del Rio beat Jack Swagger and Zeb Colter in a handicap match. Del Rio forced Swagger to tap to the cross armbreaker in another long match. Zeb didn't really get involved, as Swagger worked the whole match. Story was that Swagger kept going for his Patriot Act ankle lock, after beating down Del Rio's left leg injuring him to set up the hold. Alberto toughed it out and managed to win with his own submission. Afterwards, Del Rio was limping and couldn't put weight on the leg once the match was over, leading to...

Dolph Ziggler vs Alberto Del Rio
Dolph Ziggler won the World title, cashing in his Money In The Bank contract. Dolph attacked Del Rio's injured leg/ankle, and hit the Fameasser for a nearfall right away. Del Rio then ducked a Ziggler charge and hit his enziguri for a nearfall of his own, and then caught Ziggler in the armbreaker which worried this crowd big time. Dolph broke the hold, though, and hit the Zig Zag for the win. This is Dolph's second world title reign. The first hour and a half of this show has flown by.

The Shield & The Undertaker
Undertaker came out to address his win last night. He barely began speaking when Reigns, Rollins, and Ambrose came down to the ring through the crowd. The Shield stalked Undertaker around the ring. Just before they attacked, Kane and Daniel Bryan ran down to the ring to even the odds. This sent the Shield back through the crowd in retreat. Taker, Bryan, and Kane stood tall in the ring.

Backstage, Josh Mathews asked Dolph about his win. Dolph was a huge babyface in this building.

6-Man Tag
Santino, R-Truth, and Zack Ryder defeated 3MB in a fast paced six man tag match. This could be considered filler, but it wasn't bad.

A ton of WrestleMania press highlights were shown. Like, a ton.

Backstage, Sheamus and Orton were arguing over them wanting the match with Big Show. Sheamus bailed, telling Orton that he had this. The two then wound up in the ring after a commercial, both wanting Big Show still. Michael Cole announced that fans could vote on the WWE App for the opponent for Big Show tonight.

Back from break...
LOL. The vote was pointless. Vickie and Booker came out and said they agreed to make Orton vs Sheamus instead, with the winner getting a match with Big Show.

Randy Orton vs Sheamus
This match went forever before Big Show finally came out and beat up both guys to cause a no contest. Show destroyed Orton, and left he and Sheamus laying before leaving the arena. More entertaining than the match were the chants coming from the WWE Universe during it. JBL flat out said he thought this crowd would have as great a time even if no one was in the ring. Then, almost on cue, holy shit, that crowd chanted loudly for JBL. Also during this match, "RVD", "Ole Ole Ole!", and "Randy Savage!" were chanted. Orton didn't know how to react. Oh, yeah, the match. It was fine. But when I say that no one cared, I'm putting it lightly. Not a single person cared about these two guys at this moment. When Show came out to stop the match, the crowd chanted "Thank you Big Show!" I think at one point I even heard a "We Are Awesome" chant. So, no more crowd talk coming.

FANDANGO Wins His Raw Debut
FANDANGO and Kofi Kingston briefly wrestled until Chris Jericho stormed the ring and took out FANDANGO, giving Mr. GO the DQ victory. Jericho beat FANDANGO up all around the ring, ending it with Liontamer in the middle of the ring until two referees broke it up. As Jericho left, the dancer gave him a death stare. Jericho was the first good guy tonight to know how to play to this crowd. They loved him. 

Okay, I said I was done with the crowd talk. But no dice. The crowd, for the whole minute the match actually went on, was singing FANDANGO's theme. They were "humming" it as Cole put it. Awesome. After the beatdown, they continued singing along to FANDANGO's theme and dancing to it, as well. It was quite the visual.

This show: FLYING BY.

Josh Mathews, backstage, asked Paul Heyman about his disappointing night last night. Paul put down New Jersey, to roaring approval. Heyman sold the fact that Lesnar may have lost, but he left two guys incapacitated from last night. Paul then said that CM Punk would address his loss next week on Raw.

8-Person Tag Match
Tons of Funk and The Funkadactyles won a quick match when Sweet T and Brodus pinned Damien Sandow after a double splash. The crowd spent almost the entire match singing and dancing to FANDANGO's theme still.

Mark Henry vs John Cena
Crowd still singing FANDANGO's theme. John Cena won a nothing match via count out. The two brawled during the match outside the ring, with John getting the better of it and beating a ten count for the win.

Mark Henry attacked Cena from behind with the title belt after the match. Ryback then stormed the ring, and he and Henry brawled in the ring. Ryback hit a spinebuster on Henry sending him off. Cena was still laying in the ring from the Henry attack. Ryback set his sights on John, and at first offered a hand to help John up but he turned and attacked Cena. Ryback hit his finish on Cena to the biggest babyface pop he's had since debuting.

In Summary...
"Didn't pay attention to the ring. Crowd ruled. I think Ziggler won the title. Crowd loved it."