July 4, 2013
LIVE! From Full Sail University
by Emerson “As read on Gerwck.net” Witner
Any questions, comments concerns or emotional outbursts? Contact me:
Here's what you need to know about NXT:
-The brackets for the Woman's Title Tournament are as follows...
Paige defeated Tamina on 6/6
Alicia Fox defeated Bayley on 6/13
Summer Rae defeated Sasha Banks on 6/20
Emma defeated Aksana on 6/27
-The NXT Champion is Bo Dallas. He defeated Big E. Langston on June 13 and teased a heel turn back on May 16, but it hasn't been mentioned since.
-They also have Tag Team Champions, The Wyatt Family (Erick Rowan and Luke Harper, managed by Bray Wyatt). They captured the titles on May 9, defeating Bo Dallas and Adrian Neville
-The Family's top contenders are the mish mash team of Kassius Ohno and Corey Graves, who are now 1-1 as a team after winning a #1 Contender's Match over a team that was 2-0.
-Dusty Rhodes is the Authority Figure, but his job title seems to change from week to week.
-Sami Zayn, the former El Generico, is in the midst of a feud with Antonio Cesaro, which I am sure you are surprised to hear has led to good matches.
-The announce team is constantly rotating with some combination of Tony Dawson, William Regal, Brad Maddox and Tom Phillips
And that's everything you need to know about NXT. (Now we know!) (And knowing is half the battle) (G.I. Joe!)
-Cold open as Renee Young introduces NXT Champion Bo Dallas. Renee asks Bo about Leo Kruger. Bo was a total doofus, calling his fans “Bolievers”
Antonio Cesaro walked in and said he earned everything, which is what makes him the great man that he is and tonight he is going to take the NXT Title from Bo because in his America there is no handouts, no mediocrity and no more Bo.
Bo called Cesaro the most insignificant US Champion in history.
1.) In an NXT Woman’s Championship Tournament Semi-Final Match, Paige defeated Alicia Fox. I literally just got done watching Chris Weidman knocking Anderson Silva the fuck out. I go from that to...Paige vs Alicia Fox. You know, I don't think I could tell you who beat Alicia for the Diva's Title. I am thinking it was Eve Torres, but I couldn't tell you when it happened. This match really wasn't bad. It only went three minutes and Paige won with the Paige Turner. So now she will face the winner of Emma and Summer Rae for the championship.
-Zack Ryder tells us to not do his stuff at home. What have I been telling you about fist pumping?
2.) Conor O'Brien (w/Rick Victor) beat poor Andy Baker senseless. Rick Victor has officially replaced Kenneth Cameron as a member of The Ascension. That only took nine months. Remember when Conor was a rat? Conor won with a leg drop to the back of the head. This match was over before I could comment about NXT Season 4. Jacob Novak was such a tool.
-To the back where Renee Young is with Corey Graves and Adrian Neville. Apparently Kassius Ohno is injured from his attack by The Wyatt Family last week. Neville wanted Mr. Regal to join them.
3.) Xavier Woods pinned Scott Dawson (w/Sylvester Lefort). Xavier's titan tron picture has to be seen to be believed. It's like someone ran up to him, tapped him in the shoulder, took his picture and ran away. True story, that happened to me once. Scott Dawson is not to be confused with announcer Tony Dawson. Although I bet Sylvester would be much more entertaining with William. Tony said his brother from another mother used to watch “Sports Entertainment” as a child. That is the most ridiculous thing he has said this week. Scott threw Xavier over the top rope. You know, back in the old WCW/NWA days, a toss over the top rope would be an automatic disqualification. Yes, now I am just padding these reports. The fans chant “Dawson sucks”. I think they were talking about Tony. Anyway Xavier's head slammed off the ring apron, with gave Scott the advantage. Didn't matter much, Xavier hit the Honor Roll and the Lost in the Woods for the win.
-Bray Wyatt cut a promo. I am afraid to see what is going to happen to these three men. I am happy they are getting a shot, but I just can't see this ending well.
4.) Mason Ryan pinned Enzo Amore (w/Colin Cassidy). When they came out I swore it was Brad Maddox and Drew McIntyre. Enzo is a character. The match lasted about 5 seconds. Enzo horsed around, Mason punched him in the face and won....wait. Didn't I just see this in the Silva-Weidman fight?
-Enzo ordered Colin into the ring for a match.
5.) Mason Ryan pinned Colin Cassidy (w/Enzo Amore). This took longer, but not that much longer. Mason won with a Cobra Clutch Slam.
-If the Mason-Enzo match has taught me anything...it's that UFC is a total work and they stole that finish from NXT.
6.) NXT Champion Bo Dallas pinned Antonio Cesaro. Not sure if Bo has turned heel yet, but these fans sure treat him as such. Cesaro got a total face reaction, even though he is doing his “We The People” schtick. Yes, we have already caught up to almost current story lines. This is a championship match. Can Cesaro join Seth Rollins, Big E. Langston and Bo Dallas as the only four champions? We had a very unique move. Cesaro was on his ass near the ropes, Bo went for a running boot to the mush and Antonio ducked and school boyed Bo. Of course they were on the ropes, so Bo fell through the bottom rope and falling to the floor. Leo Kruger wandered out to ringside to watch as we come back from the last commercial break. Cesaro may be the face to the crowd, but he played them like a puppet. He kicked Bo, the fans chanted for him to do it again, so Antonio reared back...and slapped on a chin lock. Cesaro almost won the championship with a beautiful gut wrench suplex from the middle rope. Cesaro with a rear chin lock that Bo somehow turned into a cradle for a 2 count. Cesaro with the Scott Hall fall away slam that became a pinning attempt, again Bo kicks out. The finish saw Leo jump on the ropes, Cesaro run into him and Bo retain his title with that wacky hip toss thing he does.
-The fans cheered and hollered....as Leo Kruger ran in and beat down the champion. Ceasro with a European Uppercut to knock him out of the ring. Antonio starts beating on Bo, Bo fights back, Leo comes in to join in with Cesaro. Sami Zayn ran down to help Bo and the baby faces stand tall as the show ends with the fans doing the Ole! song.
Until next week, say your vitamins and take your prayers.