By Jeremy Peeples, WrestlingObserver.com
Last week, Destination America aired last year's Slammiversary show instead of Impact. The week before that, Eric Young beat Kurt Angle in a Hardcore War tag team match and then choked him with Chris Melendez's artificial leg. Tonight, during May Mayhem (because every show MUST have a title to indiciate how special it is), EY battles Kurt in an I Quit match. The Dollhouse vs. Gail Kim rivalry continues with Gail facing Taryn in a cage match, and the best of five series between The Wolves and the Dirty Heels continues with the second match. The Wolves won, so the Heels will be looking to win by any means necessary to even things up.
The show begins with EY in his car with a multi-camera shoot until he gets to the building and brawls with Kurt. They go back and forth between cameras way too quickly and get separated while EY yells about breaking Kurt's damn neck and just yells. Josh says that tonight anarchy rules...but since I guess WWE owns that name, tonight is May Mayhem. The Knockouts promo airs and we start off with the first match - Gail Kim vs. Taryn Terrell in a cage. Al Snow and his jacket are with Josh in the closet. Al describes the Dollhouse as hot, but creepy.
Match 1 - Gail Kim vs. Taryn Terrell - Six Sides of Steel
Gail jumps Taryn on the floor, but the goons try to get involved. Stinger splash in the corner to the challenger. Gail gets 2 off a flapjack. Gail smashes her into the cage and thankfully Al doesn't compare it to a cheese grater so Josh could correct him. As expected, the camera hole in the cage is used for interference. Gail takes an awesome bump off the cage. Jade and Marti tie Gail's hair into the cage. Taryn smashes Gail's hand into the cage to either break her ring hand or take her wedding ring off. A kick to the stomach sets up a flipping neckbreaker and a suplex for 2. Gail bowls over the champion before hitting a stunner to the knee in the corner. The goons prevent Gail from escaping while Jade gets the Maria Cam treatment. The Cutter hits and gets the win.
Josh says in 19 days, Taryn will break Gail's streak as KOs champion. Taryn hits a lariat to Earl and closes the catch...but doesn't latch it up, and Kong comes out while Taryn yells "lookit lookit lookit!" They lock the cage and Taryn has the key in the corner with her while the goons attack Gail. Taryn tells Gail that she's nothing compared to her while Kong attacks the cage with a chair. Taryn takes Gail's ring off, licks it, and smashes her hand against the mat and stomps it while Josh talks about Taryn's past mental problems. Taryn plays with Gail's ring using her teeth and we go to a break. This was a far better use of 13 minutes to start a show than Raw usually is.
After the break, we see Al and Josh full-screen as they recap Gail's broken finger. A quick recap of the EY-Angle brawl from earlier leads to a Storm-Magnus-Mickie recap. Josh says that the great thing about TNA is that they have "really adult stuff" and aren't PG. Josh asks why Al has a suitcase and says it's because they're moving to Wednesday. Mickie says she's coming back for one more match and recaps the Storm-Magnus problems and why it's so hard for her. Storm comes down and she says she wants to talk to him about Magnus not calling him and apologizing for the guitar shot.
He says she doesn't need to apologize to him and he'd have done what Magnus did if he was in his shoes. Mickie tells James that Magnus is just trying to protect her from Bram, and Storm says he's not a bad guy - he holds the door open for ladies, and if that makes him bad, then he's a bad, bad guy. The crowd chants "you're a bad guy" and he says "naw". Storm really needs to be a babyface. Storm talks about getting a guitar for her, a blanket for Donovan, and even bought Magnus his gladiator helmet back. The crowd chants "that was funny" and he talks about getting Mickie a meeting with big country music people - even Dale Oliver and Billy Corgan. One of these is not like the other, one of these things just doesn't belong. Josh, who is apparently now an idiot, says that Storm just might be trustworthy while Al points out that he isn't. We get an X Division gauntlet next and get a graphic with a billion guys on-screen. Kenny is defending his title tonight in this and wants to keep the title to get a World title shot.
Josh says that EY and Kurt have been locked into rooms, and EY breaks his window while showing his Twitter feed. We get a new X division hype video that will presumably air before every division match like the Knockouts one.
Match Two - Manik vs. Spud vs. DJZ vs. Tigre Uno vs. Argos vs. Crazzy Steve vs. Kenny King - X Division Title Gauntlet
Manik is out first, while Spud draws the second spot. They brawl in the corner and Spud goes to toss him over. Spud goes for an outside-in DDT, but gets faceplanted. DJZ is out and they talk about him having nowhere to go with the demise of the BroMans. Spud and DJZ attack Manik. Mandrews comes out to no reaction and ranas Manik after being tossed up by DJZ. Faces team up on Manik while Spud tries to eliminate him, but he comes back in. Argos comes out, also to no reaction. Running headscissors to Manik. He misses a corner charge, but gets a springboard rana to Manik. Manik avoids a Mandrews SSP, but can't get rid of Mandrews until he smashes his head into the post. Crazzy Steve is out for an ad break.
Uno is eliminated during the break while Al says he thought that was Argos. Kenny King is out last. Kenny runs wild before Spud attacks him. Kenny fights back and capture suplexes DJZ. Steve gets an over the top inverted triangle over the ropes, which leads to his elimination. Argos is tossed out by King. Kenny hits the Royal Flush and Josh says Spud hit the canvas at 150 MPH. DJZ gets a face buster onto King, but King reverses a whip and sends him out. Manik wants a truce with King and attacks Spud. Kenny tries to toss Spud out, and as he looks, Manik hits the pop-up Codebreaker. Manik gets tossed, so it's down to Spud vs. Kenny King. Kenny lands a slew of mounted punches to Spud.
Josh says that Spud has to win by pinfall or submission, while Kenny can just be DQed. Spud gets a small package out of the Royal Flush and Spud wins! He gets his second X Division title win, so that win sure did a lot of good for King. At least it gave Spud the motivation for his best promo of the year. We get a graphic for EY vs. Kurt and find out that it's a title match, while Heels-Wolves match two is up next. Back in the booth, Josh runs down that they'll be changing to Wednesday nights next week and Al says he'll have an amazing jacket for the PPV. The Dirty Heels come out first, followed by The Wolves.
Match Three - The Wolves vs. The Dirty Heels in Match Two of the Best of Five Series
Aries jumps the gun and Roode leapfrogs Davey mid-ring leading to a Davey dive to Aries on the floor! Eddie gets a schoolboy for 2. Davey and Eddie kick and chop away at Roode. Roode gets an atomic drop leading to a move from Aries setting up a Perfect necksnap from Roode for 2. Davey bonks Austin's head into Eddie's and Aries comes back with corner punches in his corner. Roode comes in and chops him down while Aries gets the tope con hilo for 2.
Roode nuns wild on Eddie before tagging Aries in and Davey makes a save. Eddie avoids a double team with a pair of kicks and throws Aries into Roode before tagging Davey in. Double team drop toehold>kneedrop by the Wolves to Aries and a corner head bonk for Roode. Inverted figure four/Indian deathlock by Davey to Roode - nice. Roode reversed the hold and gets the rope. German suplex with a double team jackknife cover gets 2 for the Wolves. Roode coes back from some double teams with a big lariat and a kick before making the tag.
Corner elbow and punch exchange with Davey. Aries gets a missile dropkick to one Wolf and gets a flipping German to Davey alongside the Last Chancery while Roode gets the crossface on Eddie. Davey knees out of a brainbuster, but eats a roaring elbow. Falcon Arrow>high kick from the Wolves leads to a 2.9! Roode spinebusters Eddie leading to a 450 by Aries for 2.9! Big chops by Aries, but the Wolves double team to get ahead. Aries avoids the powerbomb>backstabber and Aries flips through into a Chancery, but Davey double stomps him! Powerbomb>backstabber hits and the Wolves are up 2-0. Holy crap was this great - it might've been the best traditional tag team match on TV all year.
Angelina is startled by a camera guy and says she'll address Velvet next. But first, Kenny King calls MVP, who he calls "Montel Vontaveous Porter" and is pissed off at because he's not here. Angelina talks to Velvet, who is now in the crowd. Angelina yells for her friends to come out by just yelling "friends!", which is great. She has her own personal security team who will haul her out if she touches Angelina. She calls her a fired freak while Velvet stares stone-faced. Angelina goes to leave, but Velvet jumps her from behind. Al points out that since Velvet doesn't work her, every single thing Velvet does should result in an assault charge. Angelina calls her a freak and an idiot some more. Angelina's mic work throughout this entire thing was really annoying. Anderson is backstage in a pink-lit looking both old and jacked. Ken introduces the new cage he'll have Tyrus stuck in tonight when he faces EC3 next.
Josh says that one thing he loves about TNA is that he can say what he wants and he feels that EC3 should be World champion. Al says that EC3 deserves a shot, but not the title. EC3 says that despite his rage, Tyrus will not be a rat in the cage - I love EC3's act so much. And then Ken Anderson came out and said his name twice. Well, said it once and yelled it the second time. Al says that Tyrus is over 400 pounds now. Despite Tyrus not being in the cage, the bell rings.
Match Four - Ken Anderson vs. EC3 with Tyrus Locked in a Cage
Ken starts things off by jumping Tyrus and trying to get him in the cage, but EC3 attacks Ken. EC3 bashes him into the cage, which I guess is legal in this match. Snap suplex by EC3 gets 2 as Josh plugs Hillbilly Blood and BBQ Pitmasters. Al and Josh talk about being afraid of Dixie and Janice while Josh says he has EC3's signs made for him. So is Josh officially a heel announcer now? Josh says that EC3 was planning to arm wrestle, and was shocked by the street fight. Ken attacks Tyrus and hits his hands with a chair, then his gut and back. Tyrus goes into the cage to avoid more chairshots and Ken locks the cage. Why not do that before the match and not break up the match?
Ken runs wild with clotheslines, so EC3 rakes the eyes. Ken gets a powerslam for 2. Back and forth whips into the buckle lead to Ken getting 1 off a backdrop. Ken goes up top, but gets crotched. Inverted superplex gets 2.9! EC3 gets a Stinger splash, but Ken counters the One Percenter with a Finlay roll and a swanton for 2. EC3 counters the Mic Check, but lands it and only gets 2! Ken repositions himself, goes for it again, and EC3 counters it into his finisher for the win. This was pretty fun, honestly - not a great match, but it served its purpose. EC3 and Ken shake hands afterwards since Ken was beaten fairly...kinda
Destination America has made an ad to hype up Awesome Kong. We go backstage to Spud saying that the first time he won the title, it could be a fluke, but now, he's legit. He puts over Joe, AJ, and Jerry Lynn while the camera man talks about Option C. Spud said he didn't even know Destination X was so close - well, we still don't know. Al and Josh talk and say that next week, we'll get match three in the best of five series. Josh says that on the TNA site, EY has been counting own this I Quit match. Somehow, EY getting a tattoo months ago is due to this match. He's flanked by security, as is Kurt.
Main Event - Kurt Angle vs. Eric Young - I Quit Match
EY jumps Kurt during the big match intro - good, it would be ridiculous to not do that. Kurt gets a takedown and some mounted punches. They fight to the floor and EY gets a cheapshot and some chops. They exchange punches mid-ring before EY gets an eye rake. Kurt gets a German, then another, a third hits, now a fourth, and a fifth leads to Kurt releasing it so the ref can ask if he quits. EY says no, so Kurt suplexes him some more. EY doesn't give up again for an ad break.
After the break, Kurt dominates in the corner until EY hits him with the brace and gets the figure four. Kurt reverses the pressure, but EY won't give up. EY gets the Angle slam and the ankle lock, but Kurt won't quit. Kurt counters even with the grapevine on and gets a wonky figure four. EY misses a missile dropkick and Kurt gets a figure four. Before, Kurt did this as an homage to Dick Beyer, but while EY taps out, he didn't say he quit. Kurt releases the hold, and eats a low blow. I like that - Kurt got the win in theory with an implied submission, but didn't get the win here. Piledriver hits hard, and Kurt weakly responds with a no when asked to quit before telling EY to kiss his ass.
EY goes for a Gotch piledriver, but Kurt flips out and gets an ankle lock and EY quits after the grapevine. Al says that since Kurt's a master, it makes sense for EY to give up so quickly from that move. They really pushed the move to Wednesday hard here - so while the move has bee promoted poorly before tonight, they tried to make up for it here. We get highlights of tonight's show to set up next week, which is far better than them spoiling the show with clips. This was a pretty good show with one absolute must-watch match in the Heels vs. Wolves match, and the rest of it was at least fun.
To see every screen for tonight's show, just click here.