By Paul Fontaine, WrestlingObserver.com
Steve Kahn is out of the country on assignment so you’re stuck with me tonight, kids!
Show opens with the opening chords of Brock Lesnar’s theme song but alas, it’s just a video recap of Mania and RAW with Heyman’s promo airing on top of it. We see some brief clips of Rollins on the Today Show while Steph interrupts the promo. And then Brock’s freakout after Rollins backed out of the title match.
The opening theme song and we’re on tape for Thursday (Wednesday) Night Smackdown! from Fresno, CA. New WWE World Heavyweight Champion Seth Rollins, along with J and J security and the Demon….er…Corporate Kane and the Big Show are out for a promo and at ringside we have the all-star commentary team of Tom Phillips, Byron Saxton and Jerry “The King” Lawler. Seth recaps his last few days which we just saw video of. The WWE Universe deserves Seth Rollins at his very best and after flying across the country twice in 24 hours he just wasn’t up to his best on Monday night. He would’ve been fine defending tonight against Brock but unfortunately Brock went Brock on Monday and got himself suspended.
“I hear Voices in my head, they talk to me, they understand” interrupts Seth, just as the crowd is starting to give him the “what” treatment. “RANDY, RANDY RANDY” reminds Rollins that he beat him at Mania and he should be at the top of the list for a title shot. Crowd agrees and chants RKO RKO RKO. Rollins says that he decides when and where he’ll defend the title. Orton calls J & J spineless sewer rats and Show and Kane lap dogs for the Authority. He congratulates Show on winning the Battle Royal and mocks Kane for doing nothing at Mania and says he went from being the Big Red Monster to Little Red Riding Hood. Kane books Orton to face Show tonight. If he can defeat Show then maybe, just maybe, the Authority will reconsider his request for a title shot.
Smackdown’s Randy Orton vs. Big Show
Added “Smackdown’s” to make S.O.S. instead of the SOS I was actually thinking of when Kane booked this match. Red Riding Hood, the sewer rats and the new Champion remained at ringside. Match went about a minute before Kane and the two J’s attacked Orton for the DQ. Rollins sauntered into the ring and Orton went after him but it was 4 on 1. Not really sure what happened to Show. FEED ME MORE and The Big Guy was out of the save and they cleared the ring. If Teddy Long were here, he’d book Orton and Ryback against Show and Rollins in the Main Event.
WINNER: RANDY ORTON by DQ
Highlights of the Bryan-Ziggler match from RAW and the return of Sheamus leads to the announcement that Bryan and Sheamus will go one on one TONIGHT.
Back from commercial and we get video stills of the Rousey-Steph angle from Mania. Bella Twins join the all-star commentary team for the next match.
Natalya vs Naomi
Inset promo from Naomi and she reminds us that she pinned Nikki Bella on Monday and she could become champion any time she wants to. This crowd is much more appreciative than Monday’s rowdy hooligans were. Nikki claims that Naomi was lucky on Monday. Naomi got the win with a….i’m gonna call it a Head Scissors Driver until they give it a name.
WINNER: NAOMI by pinfall
Naomi celebrates and Nikki taunts her with the title belt. Later on tonight, The Champ is here (John Cena) and an exclusive interview with Roman Reigns.
After some more video stills, Rollins and Kane are having a talk in the back. Kane is considering Orton’s request for a title shot. Extreme Rules is less than 4 weeks away and a WWE title match between Seth Rollins and Randy Orton sounds like a good idea. Rollins leaves complaining that the office stinks and it’s bathroom humour as we hear flushing and Dean Ambrose emerges from Kane’s executive bathroom. That earns him a match later tonight with Luke Harper and Ambrose thanks him gleefully before leaving.
Byron Saxton with a sit down interview with Roman Reigns. He was honored to be in the Main event. He showed a lot of people that he was willing to take a beating. He got knocked down and picked himself back up every time. He gets “ass” in before 9 o’clock and references Suplex City. He’s thinking about buying a condo there. Brock wasn’t ready for him cause when he hit him, Brock didn’t have an answer for him. He changed Lesnar’s face with his fist.
Saxton brings up Reigns smiling and laughing at Lesnar. He claims that fight changed his life and Lesnar’s life. Lesnar “smacked the piss” out of him and he kept getting back up and smiled in his face. Then Reigns almost looked like he was gonna cry when Saxton brought up Seth Rollins. He was “this close” to getting to the top of the mountain and Seth pushed him off. Rollins had the Money in the Bank and he cashed it in at the perfect time. He showed him that he was 30 seconds away from beating Brock Lesnar. He’s beaten Rollins before. He can, he has and he will beat him again. Great promo from Reigns.
The Miz is out next for a match without his personal sidekick. We have to wait till after the commercial to find out his opponent. After some more video stills, R-Truth raps his way down to the ring and we get even more stills of the Battle Royal and then highlights of the Miz-Mizdow breakup from Monday.
THE MIZ VS R-TRUTH
Fans chanting for Mizdow as the match starts. Quick match which Miz wins with the Skull Crushing finale. Mizdown lays him out with the a Skull crushing finale of his own while the music is still playing and puts on shades and celebrates over Miz’ fallen body.
WINNER: THE MIZ by pinfall
More Mania video stills and John Cena is out for an in-ring interview. He says that the US title will finally get the respect it deserves. He put over Rusev as a wrestler but every time he opens his mouth, he proves he’s a world class dick (bleeped). Cena has news for us, America doesn’t suck! That gets a USA chant. From now on, his championship represents opportunity. He essentially calls out anyone to face him for the title. Anyone from Brock Lesnar to the Bushwhackers. He won’t run, he’ll fight them all. Each and every week, he’ll continue the John Cena Open Challenge. Rusev’s theme music interrupts the promo and he’s out with Lana. She says what happened at Mania was a travesty. USA USA USA chants illicit a SHU-TUP from Lana.
Rusev cuts her off and demans the mic. He says he did not lose, while glaring at Lana. He’s still America’s champion, a super athlete and a Russian Tank. Cena’s not a hero, he’s a coward, just like all these people. This is Rusev’s domain, this is Rusev’s country, Rusev’s world. Crowd starting to give him the WHAT treatment. Cena calls him dumb, blind and drunk. Cena reminds him he did lose and got his butt whipped. Rusev comes down to the ring and challenges him to a match at Extreme Rules. Rusev calls for the Russian flag to fall from the rafters but nothing happens. Cena then does it and the American flag drops and Rusev has a fit at ringside. Crowd explodes with USA chants and Cena starts to sing the National Anthem but morphs it into a promo promising to kick his ass at Extreme Rules. Been hearing that TV-14 word a lot these days.
The same clips of Sheamus’ return from earlier air to build up the Bryan-Sheamus match. Back from break and we get the Neville video that aired on RAW. That’s followed by more stills from Mania that bring us to the next match.
LUKE HARPER VS DEAN AMBROSE
More stills, this time of the nasty bump Ambrose took in the ladder match on Sunday. These guys actually look like they should be tag team partners with the matching outfits. A couple minutes of brawling before Harper throws Ambrose out of the ring and we go to break.
Back from break and the positions are reversed and Ambrose hits the Nigel clothesline outside the ring and quickly moves it back into the ring. Harper takes over and they’re quickly back out of the ring. Harper takes apart the announce table much more calmly than Brock did on Monday but Ambrose recovers and tries to power bomb Harper through the table. That doesn’t go to well and Harper instead powers him through the table. Ref calls for help and I guess this match is thrown out as Harper stands over his body. Harper then tosses a chair at the medical officials and goes after the ref. Probably not the best idea to be doing this right after Monday when Brock did it so much better.
After a break we get highlights of the power bomb and during the break, Ambrose walked to the back with help from the officials and medical personnel. Backstage promo from the Prime Time Players. They’re mocking The New Day. Big E sweats a lot. Kingston’s got a sunken chest. Woods has nappy hair. Hey, they said it. They chant “NEW DAY” and crickets are heard and then they do their own catchphrase to no reaction.
SHEAMUS VS DANIEL BRYAN
Sheamus has new theme music and does a promo pre-match. “YOU LOOK STUPID” chants from the crowd. He attacked Daniel Bryan because he can. “Where have all the real men gone”. Guys like Daniel Bryan and Dolph Ziggler make Kevin Hart look like Shaquille O’Neal. They’re little runts who can’t hang in the main event. He won’t rest until he puts every one of the little underdogs out of their misery. YES YES YES chants and “Flight of the Valkreyes” take us into commercial. I guess it’s non-title.
More video stills and Wade Barrett has joined the all-star commentary team without their table. Apparently this was supposed to be a tag team match with Barrett teaming Sheamus and Ziggler teaming with Bryan but Ziggler is unable to compete. Not sure why. Crowd all over Sheamus with the “You Look Stupid” chants as Sheamus is on offence early. Barrett says that he’s next in line for a title shot since he didn’t get beat for the belt. Match is a hell of a brawl with Bryan taking over with ground and pound and Sheamus takes a powder outside the ring. Sheamus turns it around with a backbreaker right before a break.
Back from break and Sheamus is basically toying with Bryan, tossing him around like a rag doll. Barrett calls the crowd pathetic for turning on Sheamus. Shades of Jesse Ventura whenever a face would turn back in the day. Sheamus mocking Bryan fires him up and and he gets in just enough offence to take Sheamus off his feet and they’re both down. Crowd wills Bryan to his feet with YES chants and Bryan tosses him out of the ring and then does his suicide dive and Sheamus takes a nasty bump headfirst into the guardrail. Back in the ring and it’s missile dropkick, a kip up and the YES kicks but Sheamus stops the last one and counters with an attempt at White Noise. Bryan counters with an attempt at a YES lock but Sheamus fights him off.
Bryan goes to the top and Sheamus crotches him, which allows them both to take a breather. Sheamus starts to work over the neck and Barrett is the only one of the four announcers to bring up Bryan’s past neck problems. Bryan turns it around with the series of head butts. Sheamus knocks him out of the ring and they claim Bryan “almost hit the announce table” but he landed on his knees between the tables. He got up with a nasty gash on his forehead so he either bladed or he was busted open hardway from the headbutts but there was no way that happened in the fall from the ring. Barrett got up and hit him with the Bull Hammer to knock him out. The doctor was out to look at the cut and Sheamus went out and toyed with Bryan during the 10 count but got back into the ring before the ref hit 10 and Bryan was counted out.
WINNER: SHEAMUS by countout
Sheamus left the ring smiling while the doctor tended to Bryan and the show closed with a full screen shot of Sheamus laughing at him.
Great main event, a couple good promos and overall a much better Smackdown than we usually get.